When I first heard about the ABCs of Death in 2012, I was extremely excited by the idea. Twenty-six directors each given a letter of the alphabet, a small budget (something like $5K, I've heard), and complete freedom to choose a word and create a short film to match it. The only stipulation being that the short had to showcase death in some way, shape, or form. When I saw the film, however, it was painfully obvious that "complete creative freedom" wasn't such a great idea for the vast majority of the short films contained within. While the film had a few bright spots, it was by and large a bunch of crap. So why get excited about the prospect of another anthology of twenty-six sub-par short films?
Despite the fact that ABCs of Death 2 still gives its filmmakers freedom to do whatever they want with the money, I think the producers this time chose an overall better group of directors to tackle the subject matter, resulting in a much stronger series of short films. Due to the nature of the movie and the brief running time of the shorts, I have divided my review into three categories. Let's start with...
The Good
A is for Amateur: Stuntman and filmmaker Eric Jacobus stars as an assassin whose pre-planning of a hit is a lot different than the reality. This one is stylishly shot and scored. It may lack horror, but it has a pretty horrific punchline.
I is for Invincible: Filipino Erik Matti directs a family of weirdos fighting over their inheritance in front of - and with - their immortal matriarch. Great makeup effects here.
J is for Jesus: Social commentary that could've been an overwrought mess, but is instead done very well thanks to a great payoff.
K is for Knell: Like one of my favorites from part 1 (V is for Vagitus), this one comes off as a small part of a fully-realized feature length story. Atmospheric and leaves you wanting more.
M is for Masticate: Another one of the more joke-y ones, but it's a great concept that is shot well and has a funny punchline.
N is for Nexus: Larry Fessenden has a way of making normal things terrifying. This one effectively builds, culminating in a realistically scary way.
O is for Ochlocracy (mob rule): unlike the extremely goofy Japanese shorts from part 1, the two in this compilation are actually good. This one involves a woman put on trial for the murder of zombies, after a "cure" has been invented. Clever.
R is for Roulette: Stylishly shot in black & white by Marvin Kren, this one is tense, but ends just when it's about to get really good.
S is for Split: The nerve-wrackingly realistic premise of a home invasion is effectively told through a well done split screen technique.
U is for Utopia: Vincenzo Natali directs this scary vision of a perfect future. This one has an ambitious story and excellent production design. Could easily be a feature film.
W is for Wish: Astron-6's Steven Kostanski directs and provides the effects for this hilarious send-up of 80s toy commercials, involving two kids who get more than they bargained for. As usual, Kostanski's practical effects and gore work are top-notch for the budget, and while this is one of the best of the bunch, it could've used an extra minute or so.
X is for Xylaphone: French filmmakers Julien Maury & Alexandre Bustillo direct this very simple premise of a nanny (the creepy Beatrice Dalle, from the directors' previous Inside and Livid) driven to extremes by a little girl's love for her favorite toy. The end reveal is downright chilling.
Y is for Youth: Soichi Umezawa's sad story of neglect is told through the use of brilliant practical effects that give life to a teenage girl's imagination.
The Bad
B is for Badger: Mighty Boosh's Julian Barratt directs and stars in this found footage entry that's all setup for a lame punchline.
C is for Capital Punishment: This one is just too heavy-handed and poorly acted, which is a shame because it features a truly disturbing decapitation by way of axe.
E is for Equilibrium: Alejandro Brugues (Juan of the Dead) directs this goofy, utterly predictable tale of what happens when two shipwrecked mates fight over a nubile woman.
F is for Falling: Another completely overwrought social commentary from the directors of 2013's Big Bad Wolves. Not very horrific, but mostly just depressing.
L is for Legacy: This piece of fried garbage, directed by Nigerian "filmmaker" Lancelot Imasuen, is terrible in every way and admirably bests Ti West's joke of a short (a usually great director that obviously pocketed the money) from the first ABCs of Death. This one features a nonsensical story, laughable acting, and truly dreadful effects and creature design.
T is for Torture Porn: The Soska Twins are so well liked by Horror fans, but I don't understand why. This short is faux-sleazy, and just kind of stupid.
V is for Vacation: I kind of liked Jerome Sable's Stage Fright, so this cheap, sleazy (real sleaze this time), poorly acted short is a huge disappointment. At least the douchebag main characters get what they deserve in the end. That's something, I guess.
The Bewildering
These shorts aren't necessarily bad, but they might be too strange or pretentious for their own good.
D is for Deloused: Robert Morgan does all of the work on this impressive stop-motion animated short that is equal parts creepy and strange.
G is for Granddad: The baffling story of an old man who wants to be like his hip, asshole grandson. We find out the old fella has been sleeping inside of the grandson's mattress (for reasons unknown). The grandson calls him a wanker and the old man reveals that he has no penis. Har har, I guess.
H is for Head Games: Bill Plympton is a great animator, but this one just feels totally out of place here.
P is for P-P-P-P-Scary!: Plays out like a live-action 1930s cartoon, and that isn't a good thing. A group of escaped cons with big fake noses and lisps stumble around in the dark and are picked off one by one by a dancing man with a baby. Makes no sense and isn't funny. I viewed this one in the same way my wife views Tim & Eric sketches.
Q is for Questionnaire: Well done, but weird. A man taking an intelligence test has his brain put into a gorilla's head. Not sure why they would even want to do that.
Z is for Zygote: This one could have easily been on the good list, because it is very good, but the premise is completely ridiculous and involves a woman keeping her unborn baby in her body for thirteen years at her husband's behest. It's a head scratcher (postpartum depression much?), but the body horror aspects really pay off and this one could be the best of the lot for that reason alone.
So there you have it. The good far outweighs the bad this time around, and I can actually recommend this one (with some hesitation). It is very long, running over two hours, but the great thing about the format is it doesn't matter if you watch it all at once. Though I might not enjoy everything about these anthologies, I am glad that they exist. And who knows, maybe the third time will be the charm?
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